Be picky with your men as you are with your selfies
You can't do epic shit with basic people.
I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile. Then walk into a pole.
My life feels like a test I didn't study for.
Tomorrow: A mystical land where 99% of all human productivity, motivation and achievement is stored.
I try to avoid things that make me fat... Like scales, mirrors and photographs.
You have the right to remain silent because whatever you say will probably be stupid anyway.
Were you born this stupid or did you take lessons?
Someday you’ll go far and I hope you stay there.
I was hoping for a battle of wits but you appear to be unarmed.
21 Funny Parenting Quotes
Top 10 inspiring quotes from Anne Frank
Life asked Death. "Why do people love me but hate you?" Death responded, "Because you are a beautiful lie and I am a painful truth."
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